Respectful communication is like air — you may not notice it when it’s there, but you sure do miss it when it’s gone!
It’s a necessity.
And, in the workplace, the lack of it will suffocate productivity, as well as interpersonal relationships.
So you’ll want to get it right!
That’s why I’ve reached out to experts who provided helpful tips on how you can achieve respectful communication at the workplace.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Respectful communication is about asserting your view through dialogue.
- Respectful communication requires active listening.
- Respectful communication includes the knowledge and proper use of cultural customs.
- Respectful communication includes paralinguistic features that have to be compensated for in written communication.
What is respectful communication in the workplace?
Respectful communication in the workplace boils down to 2 things: asserting our views, and listening to the views of others.
Naturally, your communication style influences the level to which you can communicate respectfully.
The key to respectful communication is to be assertive. Assertive communication is the middle ground between aggressive and passive communication styles, allowing you to make your point while respecting both others and yourself.
To get the listening part down, you need to engage in dialogues instead of discussions.
In his book On Dialogue, David Bohm likens discussions to a game of ping-pong, where there’s constant back and forth and someone always wants to win.
Dialogues, on the other hand, he describes as a process of meaningful exchange of thought, where the goal is to come to a new understanding — nobody is trying to win, but if anyone wins, everyone wins.
So, respectful communication in the workplace can further be described as assertive communication in the form of a dialogue.
Let’s now add another, cultural layer to it: if you have business partners from a different country, the customs of the said country — for example, those tied to greetings — will also play a part in what you’ll do, to communicate respectfully.
For instance, in Brazil, you can expect a firm handshake when meeting with your partners.
In Turkey, firm handshakes are considered rude.
And, in Japan, handshakes aren’t really a thing.
Even then, some things are universal — at the end of a meeting, no matter where and with whom, it’s always polite to say: “Thank you for taking the time to meet with me.”
Further reading
Cultural and language barriers are massive barriers to respectful communication, simply because what’s polite and respectful in one place can come across completely differently in another. For more info on this, check out this guide:
In the end, respectful communication in the workplace can best be described as assertive communication in the form of a dialogue — where everyone involved is mindful of who they are communicating with.
Tips for achieving respectful communication in the workplace
But that’s enough definitions — reciting them won’t score you any points with anyone.
Instead, you’ll need to really practice what you preach.
As Michelle Rakshys, Vice President of Learning & Development at Cadence and Leadership, so eloquently put it:
“I always remember that every interaction and communication builds, maintains, or damages relationships. I always want to be in the building stage, so I’ll change my communication to ensure I’m improving my relationship with the other person, even if I’m delivering bad news.”
With that in mind, let’s focus on actionable tips from our expert contributors on what you can do to make your communication more respectful in a work environment.
This is what you should (and shouldn’t) do to build, rather than damage, your professional relationships.
Tip #1: Listen (and don’t interrupt!)
To quote Dr. Sam Adeyemi, CEO, executive coach, and author of SHIFTS: 6 Steps to Transform Your Mindset and Elevate Your Leadership, “never interrupt”:
“Interruption tells others that:
a) you are not listening,
b) you are not listening with an open mind, or
c) you feel that you or your point of view is more important than them/theirs.
This will inevitably irk, upset, and cause others to feel small/dominated.”
Dr. Adeyemi also adds that you should listen without prejudice — give everyone your full listening since everyone deserves to be heard and has the ability to deliver something of great value.
And he is not alone in this, as several other experts echo the same sentiment.
Executive Coach and an Official Member of the Forbes Coaches Council, Irene McConnell, reminds us that this listening should be active:
“When you actively listen to people, you understand their views and are better able to reply and react. The other party also feels that their views and opinions are being heard, and a positive culture is created.”
This also means allowing for silence while you wait for the other person to formulate their thoughts. As Dallin Cooper, keynote speaker on communication, conflict management, trust, and leadership, puts it:
“You have to listen. Really listen. Maybe that means sitting in silence for 10 seconds, 20 seconds, a minute, while someone collects their thoughts. Sit in the silence. Let people know that you care, you’re curious, and you are willing to listen, and you’ll be able to find and resolve most misunderstandings.”
Tip #2: Summarize and repeat what you’ve heard
Don’t automatically assume that you understood what the other person wanted to get across, just because you listened.
According to Dr. Adeyemi, instead of making assumptions, it’s better to summarize the key points and repeat what you understood:
“Paraphrasing what you’ve just heard confirms that you’ve received the message accurately and without judgement. Summarizing in this way doesn’t necessarily mean that you agree or disagree with them, but it does make the speaker feel heard, respected, and acknowledged.”
And it’s not just your interpersonal relationships that’ll benefit from this — it will also reflect positively on business productivity. That’s the part that Robin Westerling, founder of Longvadon.com and AdBright.io, emphasizes through his example:
“An example of this would be to say ‘I understand you built that spreadsheet and ran into issues, and I can see how that would be difficult for you…’
“This type of communication will lead to better conversations and more productivity within your business. It certainly has helped me foster better connections and respect with my employees.”
Tip #3: Choose the right channel
You have to choose the right channel for your message. Some messages are okay as emails, some should be DMs, and others simply require face-to-face communication (or its closest virtual approximation).
According to Brittany L. Truszkowski, COO at Grand Canyon Law Group, 4 emails is already too many emails:
“Complicated matters require real-time dialogue, particularly those that involve feedback or dispute. I say ‘If it takes more than three emails to fix, it’s time to talk.’”
Further reading
The tips in this guide pertain to respectful communication in general. For more concrete expert tips on how to provide feedback, you’ll want to read this:
This is especially important in situations where emotions are high. In such cases, Karen Watts, founder & CEO at DomiSource, recommends changing the channel if there’s even a 10% chance your message could be misread:
“If there’s too much at stake, if it’s too emotional or too nuanced — I switch to voice, preferably video. You have no idea how much can be achieved in 15 minutes of conversation that would otherwise take 20 messages.”
She underscores this point with the concise sentiment that: “Delivering the right message on the wrong channel is always a lost opportunity.”
Tip #4: Mind your body language and smile
Speaking of paralinguistic features, Watts also reminds us that our bodies are always louder than our words:
“You might say ‘yes, I understand,’ but if your arms are crossed, your eyes are looking at the floor, and your tone is clipped, your team hears ‘I’m checked out’ or ‘I’m angry.’ So check your body. Is your stance open? Is your face present? Are your words and tone of voice in the same key? If not, your message is inconsistent, and you will not even know why people stop trusting you.”
On a related note, Director of Communications & PR at StaffDNA Lisa Dawson emphasizes the importance of smiling:
“Try to smile when the other person is talking (not the whole time, so you don’t look insane). A little smile gives them positive affirmation and makes the other person feel good about what they’re telling you.”
Tip #5: Pause and consider how you’ll come across
Another tip for ensuring your communication is respectful is to consider how your message will come across.
As Watts puts it, ask yourself what the impact of what you’re about to say is.
“Before I respond or send anything impactful, I always do a gut check: Is this going to clarify, confuse, or cause damage? If it risks the latter two, I change how I say it — or if I say it at all.”
Another related tip that’ll help you internalize this practice comes from Truszkowski, who urges us to not send messages impulsively and as soon as we are finished typing them out. Instead, she recommends you pause and think how you would feel if you received that message. As she puts it:
“Even straightforward messages can drop like a lead balloon if tone comes across as cold or abrupt.”
Tip #6: Begin with questions and use expansion statements
The tips so far have been great for building and maintaining a respectful atmosphere, but they don’t tell you how to respectfully ask for information or start a conversation.
Not to worry though — our expert contributors didn’t leave this part out.
To start with, you should follow Truszkowski’s advice, which is to begin with open questions like: “As we get started tonight, do you want to walk me through your thinking here?” As she puts it, this shows that you respect the other person’s point of view and opens the door for understanding.
Once you get the conversation started, Dr. Adeyemi suggests using expansion statements to keep it going in a respectful manner:
“In a conversation, meeting, or interview, using an expansion statement such as ‘Tell me more’ after someone has spoken is a way to:
a) confirm to the speaker that you have been listening to them,
b) communicate that you have a level of interest in what they’re saying, and
c) invite the speaker to expound upon their thoughts.
“It’s a great way to invite others to open up and shift into a deeper gear with what they’re communicating.”
Tip #7: Contain urgency and set the tone
When dealing with urgency, we don’t tend to prioritize respect — but this shouldn’t be the case. Urgency does not preclude respect!
So, how do you balance the two?
Fractional COO and Operations Strategist Denisse Calderon-Trevizo has shared some pointers on overcoming the ASAP mentality:
“High-growth environments create urgency, but respectful leadership means knowing when to slow down to prevent burnout and resentment. Replacing ‘ASAP’ with ‘Can this be done by Thursday? If not, what’s realistic?’ maintains momentum and dignity. While strict deadlines are sometimes inevitable, don’t forget to factor in the human element when making requests.”
This tip can be useful for everybody, but Calderon-Trevizo mentions leadership because, according to her, their tone sets the tempo for respectful communication inside the organization:
“Calm, clear, and direct communication isn’t just professional, it becomes cultural shorthand for how the team handles stress, feedback, and collaboration. To truly be an effective leader, you must always lead by example in all ways.”
Further reading
There’s a lot that goes into being a good leader. To get a good sense of what leadership is like in 2025, check out our statistical breakdown:
Calderon-Trevizo also highlights the fact that respect starts with operational clarity:
“When roles, expectations, and decisions are documented, communication becomes cleaner and less emotionally charged. It’s not just respectful, it’s sustainable and sets the tone to how the work will flow.”
Respectful communication helps you build and maintain professional relationships
In the immortal words of the American Poet Maya Angelou: “[P]eople will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
Respectful communication in the workplace isn’t just about improving productivity — although it does accomplish that. It’s about dignity, human connection, and building strong relationships.
Following the tips in this guide will help you accomplish this. It will take patience and effort, but you’ll come out a better communicator for it.
Are you looking for a platform where you can carry out respectful communication with your teams and business partners? Check out the team communication app Pumble, or try it as part of our CAKE.com Bundle.